Wednesday, January 1, 2020

so, it's 2020 is it.

I have not written in so long that I'm surprised to find my blog still exists. My typing is so full of stumbles I hardly know if my fingers are in the right places. But, if how I feel today is any indication, maybe that's all going to change. Because, you know - everything changes on January 1, right? Ha.

Almost 5 years ago I wrote a list of 100 things I'd like to do, be, or experience. I had a running start at it, but interruptions in cash flow and a crisis of confidence have slowed my ability to cross things off that list. Oh sure, some of them didn't require money, but 2019 was largely about survival for me, which doesn't leave a lot of energy for creating.

I don't tend to write New Year's resolutions, but I do find December a good time to reflect on the closing year and set an intention for the coming one. I struggled this year to find a word for that intention that really inspires me. "Vision" and "Focus" both came to mind but

a. neither really hit the mark on what I want this year to be
b. I HATE puns so for 2020, nothing sight-related would do.

And then I found it - a word with two primary meanings, both of which have been missing from my life lately.


It has been my experience that achieving things I desire or promise (to myself or others) leads to satisfaction, happiness, and a sense of developing myself. And, to be immodest, I've been pretty good at those things, in general. I've certainly long considered myself someone who manages to cross things off a list. For all the personal development work I've done though, my abilities and character are definitely not "fully developed." There's room to grow.

So, I'm looking forward to a fulfilling year: to crossing things off lists old and new (first step - updating my Quest for Plenty into a Quest for Fulfillment); to developing my abilities and character; to achieving desires and keeping promises.

PS: One of those promises I make right now to the three people who keep asking - I will write more. Consciously and with an eye to fully developing that ability.

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