what the mirror doesn't say

Mirror, Mirror by Esther Poyer (Trust 30 Prompt 28)

“Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

• Mirror, mirror on the wall… find the nearest mirror. Look. Keep looking for 3 minutes. Write about what you see.

I couldn't. This was supposed to be the prompt 8 posts ago, and I just keep shoving it back. I just can't do it. I know that what I see in the mirror isn't really what's there. And it's not what anyone else sees when they look at me outside the mirror. 

When I look in the mirror I see tired, worn out, flabby. I look closer to my age than I used to. My wrinkles are less 'smile lines' and more 'stress fissures.' And, even if I worked out every day for the rest of my life, and by some miracle that is enough to counteract genetics and years of neglect and three pregnancies and four abdominal surgeries, and some freak of fortune turned my current pillow into a taut trampoline, it'd still be scarred and stretch marked and ... blah blah blah. 

What I see in the mirror is not me. 

I'm in the middle of a week+ of stay-cation  - today is day 5 of 10. I've been having a great time with STG and DivaMoe and SC2 and BB1. We've got a FANTASTIC weekend planned in Vancouver that includes the PNE and the aquarium and staying in a hotel and no diets and just having fun. STG's kids will be there. BB2 and his Sweetie will be there. We'll laugh and argue about what to do next and spend money on things we'd never usually even look at and crash at the hotel at the end of the day and create memories that will last for all of us. 

And that is me - fun. Adventurous. Committed to my family. Exploring new possibilities. No mirror can show me that.